DON’T MARRY BECAUSE OF A TITLE

Most people this days go into marriage with their titles more than the basic requirement of marriage eg love and submission. Our parents and society drum this titles so much that you can be easily be deceived that they’ll live happily married from there.. You hear parents say our son Doctor xxx is marrying engineer BBB! The wedding is colorful. All the mighty in the Land attend and the gifts are numerous, both from colleague and family! We thank God our son got a professional like him,” you’ll hear parents from both sides say!
As a daughter or son of a professor, big politician, Business magnet and etc, People expect you to have the best in the market as a husband! You’re constantly reminded you come from a famous family tree and the people you walk with are closely monitored in certain homes. You don’t need to be told, but your love life is defined for you by society. One of my friends once told me she can’t go anywhere. She had been a signed a driver at home and just coming out to go see someone in town needed permission from the guards at the gate, and the driver needed authorization from mum and dad before she is driven out! Her campus calendar is pinned at the parents bedroom and the driver takes her to class and has to wait outside in campus for the two or 4 hrs to end, before driving her back home. This is not an under 18 girl but someone in her 20’s.
If someone with a diploma with no more papers to talk about wants to marry such a girl-out of genuine love, friends and family will surround her with so much advise …You can’t wait on the Lord over this yrs as a virgin and then marry such a man? They will advise with so much passion.. soon, the love you were developing for this diploma graduate dwindles as you wait on the Lord for a saved professional like you! How can a doctor marry a musician? they say with an attitude! Then ndoa ndio hio (then marriage comes )…it was a setup marriage by parents who drove you to a family friend’s home, only to introduce you to his son and given time to talk him.. he is a who and who in society too….. Not really… His parents are who and who’s in the society but he got papers too- so you marry with so much praise from both parents- but oh, the doctor, actuarial scientist or that engineer starts demeaning you openly.. He sees you in the eyes of the degree you did and thinks you weren’t clever enough to get grades for a good course… Before you know it, makofi na mateke, ( slaps and kicks) yet you haven’t finished your honeymoon). Some who pretend well finish the honeymoon and start life in fear of loosing a marriage so early, because parents by this time, push the weight of carrying this marriage in the shoulders of the woman! She’s suffering silently and wishing out but mum sends her proverbs 31 and drums proverbs 14:1 verse,” which says,”a follish woman tears her marriage with her own hands!
As a simple woman with little knowledge on marriage, you sob uncontrollably over failed expectations. Ofcourse you can’t deny the word of God and its power but what about this abuse? You ask yourself, “I’m a woman and want to be talked to in respect and honor but this once glamorous and energetic woman now bends to accommodate abuse. To add insult to an aready injured soul, she’s told, and to her face of how stupid she’s- and the reason behind her low grades is because her brain isn’t much! Ouch! Sometimes I listen to what happens in some of this homes and you wonder why people can be blessed by God materially yet have so much hate towards each other as couples! If money makes a marriage work, then America, the richest country on earth should be having best marriages ever- but sad to note, America leads in divorce and re-marriage! Survey says that in every 10 couples you meet in the USA, 3-4 have divorced twice and re-married!
In Kenya, among our elites in this big homes, some women and few men “who are kept”,leave as slaves in their own home. Problem is, most choose titles when getting married instead of love!
I was listening to another friend who was telling me of her Aunt-gets locked in the house and her car locked too in the packing ( they all have cars)! This are professionals.. Another hit her wife ( who was Director in a big firm) with a hammer and she died. He’s now in jail serving a life sentence, yet he was a director too, in another big place! I’m not saying marrying a poor man gives you an insurance from trouble, but where love is absent- in both poor and rich homes, strife comes from every corner. Some marriages simple things can make them fight-eg where the matchstick was kept yesterday. With no love in your heart and asking your wife where the matchstick is,it makes the home boil with animosity to un-imaginable levels.
Some woman killed herself sometime back in Nakuru just because after giving back on her abusive marriage, she went back to her parents only for her mum to give her fare back to her marriage.. Go and sort your issues with your husband,” that’s what she was told, as mum locked the door for her. With nowhere to go, and without asking for advice, she committed suicide.
The best decision you can make is to stick to that man who loves you, even if he is how low than go with parents who look down on him/her, only to be married to that man in a bungalow, who chains you in your own home! My friends, love matters shouldn’t be taken lightly. Marriage is a life long commitment that demands your time, your love, your commitment and ofcourse, it’s a sweet thing when you get the same back,in appreciating.Never put class in mind when love is in the air. A home was mearnt to be a haven for couples and a sanctuary to children. Infact,God’s intentions for marriage was simple..He says,” Didn’t the LORD make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth.(Malachi 2:15). If God’s intentions are this simple on issues marriage,then let us not complicate it with class and issues that have no meaning in building a home. Pray continually and seek God’s direction-before making a love decision. You may thank me later in yrs to come,that you listened to me.God bless you